Christmas

I spent 90% of my adolscence hoping that people would leave me the hell alone and treat me like I was invisable. Most people dread being ignored, but any day where I wasn't taunted and made to feel like a pathetic freak of nature in school was a good day in my books. I remember being picked 4th last in gym one day and feeling like I won the lottery. YAY! THERE ARE BIGGER LOSERS THEN ME! HAPPY DAYS!

These days I actually wilt with too much isolation. Reading, writing and day dreaming are all excellent solitary activities, but there are only so many political debates that I can have with my cat before it begins to seem kind of one sided (her arguments are faulty), and a see-saw at the jungle gym is dull without a second person. I guess I look kind of silly on it anyways, but its not my fault they make these awesome playgrounds for miniature parasites (also known as children) instead of hard working, blue collared tax payers like myself.

But, yet again, I digress. The point I am trying to make is that, although I am extremely homesick during this time of year, I hate heading home. I love my parents. I love being cooked for, pampered and made much of. If it comes in occasional small doses and doesn't become too overwhelming, who doesn't? But I dread heading home and seeing that blasted "Welcome to Campbell River" sign. Its like every ounce of sophistication, social skills, and self worth that I have acquired since moving to Vancouver vanishes, and I am left with an awkward, empty shell of the person that I am now.

I don't have a snappy way to end this post, it feels unfinished. Just some reflections on the holiday season. Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night :)