In the line up at the Safeway cashiers:
Guy Behind Me: You sure can fit a lot in a basket.
Me: (Tired and not wanting to small talk): Yup.
GBM: I thought I was bad but wow you sure put a lot of stuff in yours.
Me: Yup.
GBM: How many vegetables does one person need?
Me: Yeah I just put whatever fits in there.
GNM: DID YOU SAY WHATEVER TO ME?
Me (in snobby voice): I said whatever fits.
GNM: Fine then BITCH. NICE TALKING TO YOU.
At this point I turn around to look at the crazy man yelling at me. He is probably 6'5, 300 pounds, dishelved and has terrible teeth.
GBM: Please don't look at me. Stop looking at me. GO AWAY.
Me: Ok.
I then opened an Archie comic and pondered why the crazies always follow me.
